SOLI LAOSHI

Today I have the misfortune of sitting in for 120 minutes (3 periods) in the removed class (PERALIHAN)

New teacher image

5 minutes in,  two of them start shouting "pigu" (mandarin for 'buttocks') at some girls walking past. 

In my limited knowledge of Mandarin, "pigu" had made it's way into my vocabulary. 

So I grab my handy plastic ruler and rap the offenders on their palms (which they offer up quite quickly, much to my annoyance)

As soon as I turn my back, another one yells out the window..."WOIIII PIGU!" 

I spin around and yank the offenders ears, a punishment that always brought immediate apologies growing up in my household. Sure enough...

"OWW. sorry laoshi...sorry laoshi"

"ONE MORE TIME I HEAR YOU SAY THAT WORD...." I brandish the ruler and glare at them 

I even swat the air a few times for effect of the "whoosh sound"

"okay okay, cikgu tau meh pigu itu apa!?"

"TAU!"

"okay okay"

I take five steps towards the teacher's table and then I hear it...

A low...soft...chanting...of 6 or 7 boys,a unified harmonious, even haunting minion tune...

peeee....guuuu......peeee....guuuuuu....peeeee....guuuuuu...peeeee....guuuuu....

I sigh.... look down at my watch.....only 15 minutes have gone by...

My first "Relief" Period

I dunno what I was thinking, but I was pretty cheerful going up the staircase to 5SS2.

These kids are probably all nerds busy with chemistry or physics and addmaths. They won't bother looking up as I enter, and I won't mind one bit. I'll work on my record book, and they'll work on their piles of homework. And we'll be left alone in blissful silence. 

As I ascend the staircase, I hear wolf whistles. 

Brain: Small reminder Miss Liz, this isn't Klang...  these are not the  kiasu pimple-faced-tuition-going students that you were surrounded by in highschool. 

It's okay, let me just get to my nerd haven of silence. 

One girl peers at me through the window sill, 

"Relief ka?" she demands, as if I interrupted...her life. 

"Yes"

"Woi diam! Cikgu masuk, hormat skittt" 

"heh, *clears throat* Good afternoon class"

*lazy drawlllll from 5 out of the 20 seated there. "Good afternoon teacher" 

hang on, what is this class? Am I in the right place.

brain: Subtly ask them

"So, er, this is 5SS2?" (so much for subtle)

"yeah"

brain:. What you gonna do Miss Liz?

*clears throat
"Since I don't know you, let's introduce ourselves"

"Cikgu cakap apa ni tak paham"

*clears throat
"I.want. to. know. your. NAMES..

 "die cakap apa ni?"Bloody girl says

brain: It's okay Miss Liz, just walk. Fold your arms! and walk. Slow steps... like you're NOT shivering inside
They will eventually stop looking at you like a piece of meat. ..

In walks three of the oddest looking boys. One is really tall, he's almost reaching the door frame, one more stocky with bloodshot eyes, and the other looks like Goyle. I immediately dislike them

I dislike them for entering...which took something out of my POWER WALK around the class.

I dislike them for being so tall which took some height out of me in my fancy heels

I dislike them for not even glancing at me as they saunter in

"Good afternoon sirs!" I announce

they look up smile and sit down against the wall meat-staring me.

Okay I'm done with this stupid walk. It hasn't achieved much

stomps back to teacher's chair.

brain: Do not look away Miss Liz. Keep your eyes on them and stare. Just stare. oh fold your arms too. looks good.

Fine. Stare....death stare

"WHAT!" he thunders suddenly as he catches me looking at him

I think I stop breathing for a few seconds. Am I still alive? So much for stupid death stare.

brain:. DO NOT LOOK AWAY

Okayyy..stare...

"WHAT YOU LOOK ME!!" he yells banging his palm on the desk.

Jesus please, let me live through this ordeal

brain: Miss Liz get a grip. you. teacher. he. student. remember. Now smirk

*clears throat
*smiles
"it's WHY are you looKING at me"

A momentary expression of confusion crosses his face.

"apa la ko ni, WHY dengan WHAT pun tak tau" his friends are quick to tease realizing what just happened.

 He looks at me and then breaks out into the widest grin.

And I smile. We're good.

(mentally) SLAP YOuRSELF!

When people ask me, how teaching has been so far, I have decided that the best answer is that there are good days, where you feel like Mary Poppins and there are days when you are Snape.

During yesterday’s poetry lesson, we had an engaging discussion on things that were not fair or wrong in the country.

And everyone participated.

And I felt light and happy.

Last week, after a particularly exhausting day of trying to get the students to focus on the task, one student tells me very matter of factly “teacher kelas kamu sangat bosanla, takda syiok” “kelas 

cikgu lain lagi syiok” which translates to “teacher your class is extremely boring, and not fun at all” “all the other teachers’ classes are more fun” to which I replied “oh is that so? Thank you very much”

But inside, I felt a bit broken.

At least three times a week, I ask myself why the hell I chose to do this but then I figured, I’m sure people from other fields struggle with this question at least once in their life, and then I mentally slap myself for whining.  

First week in the Blackboard Jungle

Hello reader, as some of you know, I've been on my practical stint in SMK Tunku Abdul Aziz, Simpang Empat, Alor Setar, Kedah, for two weeks now.Going into this, I remember I was terrified mostly of the unknown; the people I had not met, and the students that I did not know, the place that I hadn't grown accustomed to. But it turns out, after two weeks, the teachers are nice, the place isn't that confusing, and my class makes me smile. I am assigned to a Form 3 and a Form 1 class. But I've entered many other classrooms on relief duty, some with a less friendly crowd than others. 

My students in Form 3 are in the first class, but they come in one passive package. I feel like I still cannot get them to open up. I know that because when I'm having a class discussion and someone says something funny and laughs and I ask them the just shake their head and look away, as if it's "not worth" telling me. HAHA. Dramatic much. But  there have been times when this class has come alive. I witnessed this rare moment during an interesting discussion on toilet etiquette. I believe that I have to stay focused on what I want them to learn at the same time have at least one engaging activity to bring them out of their shells a bit. Names 99% memorized

My Form 1 students are the cutest bunch of passive students. I think they live by the phrase "Silence is Golden" which is bit troublesome when the objective of the English Period is to get them to talk. Currently our Form 1 batch is undergoing a program called OPS- English, which is targeted to improve their Oral Proficiency. Ops-English comes equipped with its own textbook and CD. Throughout the program which lasts till june, students are not allowed to do any writing. No essays, no paragraph writing. It's all about speaking and listening. At first it seemed like a heaven sent program, because of its simplicity. In actual fact, when you're given a very passive class who has no intention on speaking, then figuring out lesson plans can be a pain in the neck. Oh well, lets put that 4 years of uni to use. Names 70% memorized

That's all there is, 

There isn't any more. 

Pre-teaching (Countdown day 3)

Today, we followed our advisor to a school to observe her other practicum mentee. The three of us sat behind along with our lecturer and watched my senior handle this class. I was in awe, as she coolly handled these Form 4 students and projected a stern demeanor whilst still maintaining an approachable personality. She had already begun to remember their names, and had a good developing rapport with the students.

She used quite a few words in Malay after seeing that they didn't understand it in English. One boy when praised, would say "Awesome" obviously having picked it up from her previous class. Our lecturer mentioned that positive feedback and  encouraging words were always a good thing. Because students need to feel that their answers are valued.

Another incident I recall was when a girl gave a suggestion, and her answer was dismissed with a "no, that's not a good answer"..
I was surprised when she said. "Okay okay teacher, I just try"
She was one of the better ones, who had more confidence than the rest.

I learnt that teacher movement around the classroom was very important and that some students at the back were interested in the lesson but didn't get enough of the teacher's attention to bother about performing in class.

I guess I'm most nervous about classroom management and this was indeed a very useful experience of going and observing another teacher in her classroom. Our lecturer advised us to ask our school mentoring-teacher if we could sit in for the lessons to watch the teacher before taking over the following week.

Our school is reportedly still preparing our timetables and we most probably will be getting the lower form classes.

That's all there is,
There isn't any more.  

Pre-teaching (Countdown day 4)

Okay, it's crunch time. I've been dreading this moment for ages now. It reminds me of how I dreaded diving lessons at the pool, or driving lessons and driving school, or public speaking competitions, or debate rounds, or the literature exams, and then the moment came and passed, and I emerged all the better for it.

The hardest thing right now is finding the motivation to keep myself confident. What is it about those unknown faces? or is it because I am facing the unknown? Sometimes I find myself terrified of failure, sometimes worried sick with the challenges, and very occasionally  fleeting excitement at the prospect of stepping into the beginning of this new chapter.

For my practicals, I was placed with two of my classmates and good friends Lea and Zaini. This evening, Zaini and I took a test drive to the school to familiarize ourselves with the route. I still don't know the way though so Zaini will be the GPS I guess. The school is situated a good 30km from our hostels and this means a 40 minute drive with traffic and traffic lights. Which means that we'll be getting up at the crack of dawn to beat traffic and get to school for a decent clock-in.

We met our supervisors today and mine is one of the nicest lecturers ever but she had some not-so-nice news. She gravely told us that the school we were attached to for this 4 month teaching practical was notorious for major discipline problems and in many cases the police had to be called to intervene. Anyhow, my advisor has given us the green light to call her to observe us any time to get some feedback and improvement tips.

I have not signed in at my school yet. A lot of us haven't. We'll probably do so on Sunday. In case you didn't know, in Kedah, the weekend is from Friday to Saturday, and we work on Sunday.

That's all there is,
there isn't any more.

Lau Puts her Foot Down

Now and again, Lau (not real name) coins a new nickname symbolizing my relationship status and at the moment it was single-since-birth- Liza. On dating, she said she wouldn't allow me to date just anyone. He would have to be smart, speak good English (whatever that was) and come from Subang (eye roll).

Now, normally Lau's shallow ideals would have me snorting with laughter, but suddenly I began to wonder where my list was. By "LIST" I meant where on earth had I chucked the MY-FUTURE-HUSBAND section in the notebook? Lau was right in a sense; I couldn't welcome just any Tom Dick or Harry who showed interest with no walls up at all, not even a baggage check. I had to have something in mind.

And so I began the process of  listing down the things that I prioritize in the opposite sex.

I used to think that "making me laugh" was enough for someone to qualify. I mean what else could you want?

But I quickly realized that if people asked me "Oh how did you know he was the one?"
 my answer would seem really silly.

Instead I'm going to edit that and say he has to have a sense of humour.

Having a good sense of humour is more than just being able to crack jokes. It is being able to see the light side of things, it's being able to smile, not frown, at silliness. It's being able to tolerate when your other half is being intolerable.

And one other thing, I think I needed someone who didn't think women were second to men in the sense that it would be a huge blow to their ego if a woman wanted to drive instead, or god forbid  a woman gave a suggestion on why something was wrong with the car. Or a person who expected (without discussion) that a woman play certain roles that society has deemed acceptable for our gender. I'd go crazy...and beat him with a rolling pin or pull his hair out. *cough* right...anyway. I swear I'm nice in general.  

Apart from these two things, it depends on who I meet I guess. I mean I can't be setting up 101 road blocks in the form of height, weight and hip width can I. That's weird, plus, I'm too flawed to expect perfection. Haw haw

The see-saw is the least fun playground toy to play on alone
You always need someone on the other end to send you up when you're down, and bring down to earth, when you're too high up.  *quotable quotes much*

Everyone needs some ideals or principles that are important. NOT a cut out mold that someone should magically fit into. Have you thought of yours yet?

Cheers.