4 things you didn't know about University

I've thought about it for a long time and realise that apart from brains, looks and a religion you absolutely have to possess some BASIC survival skills before stepping into the University Jungle, or it’s going to be a bumpy ride. Did I say bumpy? I meant HELL OF AN AWKWARD ride.

1.         1  OwN sMALL tALk!!!

I’m telling you, if you don’t own small talk, you are a LOSER and will have no friends for the rest of university life.

Many people don’t realise the importance of this till it’s too late.

My idea of small talk is blurting out random topics eventhough the small talk topic has already been established.

After my jog..

Guy: how many rounds today?

Liza: 7

Stare, stare, awkward, stare (this is where I’m supposed to say something)

Liza: you bought milo!(huh??)....where are you going? (too weird)...hello (redundant)...you didn’t jog? (obviously)...why didn’t you jog? (mother freak)

We’ve passed and I am left with  

2.    ThE DeAf will noT SuRviVe

and I speak from experience...

At the pasar malam

Girl: liza! Datang naik apa? Van ke?

Liza: ya, dah habis beli

At orientation

Lecturer: awak ni bangsa india ke?

Liza: er.. Klang.

Girl: lizaa.. Beli apa?

Liza: oh..jalan kaki.

So before people think you are a complete mental case, please clean out your ears now and again.

3.   Don’T dResS liKe yOU Own ThE CamPus

Because you don’t, you little spastic. Your seniors own the place. And their seniors own the place (to them) and this piece of mental cognition carries on till the most senior students... who are actually nice people (because they KNOW they own the placeJ

4.    Smile AT EVeRyoNe! especially to seniors. Owh mental note for everyone. be the first to smile.

Not this kinda smile

It might induce instant hatred and again people might come to a bad conclusion about you mental health.

Try being normal lah.

the hey-ive-seen-you-around smile

it looks like this    =)

Follow these guidelines/pieces of advice and you should have a bump free uni life

ooh on fashion,

 girls get a bra that fits right, 

and guys, bell bottom/70's style pants/ jeans should be burnt!! ..in hell...they are not cool.